Here’s to the Hard and Messy Seasons

Roller Coasters. Some people love them, others hate them. I’m not a fan. I get scared that I’ll get stuck on one. Scary stuff. Anyway, have you ever compared your life or your emotions to a roller coaster? Because I have and that’s how my life has been over the past month or so.

Emotional Rollercoaster.

Now, don’t misunderstand me here. Because this emotional roller coaster that I’ve been on hasn’t been a bad emotional rollercoaster. It’s actually been really good. Hard but really good.

I’ve learned that there are seasons in life that you feel like you’re in the dark and have no idea what is happening. And other seasons you feel as though you completely understand what is happening.

This season of life is a season of preparation for me and it’s creating that emotional rollercoaster. The Lord is weeding out the things that are keeping me from Him. It’s a season of healing. Of letting go of people, things, the past, and stepping into the big future God has planned for me. It’s a time and season of growth and anticipation. A time of pruning and becoming the woman God created me to be.

And can I let you in on a little secret? I might cry a lot. I might seem frustrated and overwhelmed. But I wouldn’t change it. Not for a million dollars. Because I can see and feel myself changing. I’m stepping closer to Jesus everyday. And I’m so excited about what Jesus has planned for my life. Like that excited that you felt when you were a kid and it was your birthday or Christmas. That butterflies in your stomach, shout it to the world, grinning ear to ear, full of the giggles excited. That’s how I feel about the future.

I’m not saying I’m not scared. Because a little part of me is still. But as I continue to surrender the messy parts of my life to Jesus, I grow in my confidence in Him and I feel a little bit more like I can conquer the big scary things He’s calling me to. And that’s exciting.

It’s exciting to watch God work. Especially when it’s so tangible in your own life.

So yes, my life is a hot mess right now. I cry. I laugh. I get mad. But I have the pleasure of taking it all to Jesus. He’s pulling all the junk out of my life so that I can know Him more fully. And that brings me joy.

Is Jesus pulling the junk out in your life right now? Are you an emotional rollercoaster?

If you said yes. Embrace it. Embrace this messy season. Embrace the preparation. Because I can guarantee that someday you’ll look back and this season will bring you joy.

So here’s to the hard. To the tears. To the laughter. To letting go. And to letting God wreck your life in the most beautiful way.

xoxo -Cal

As always, I’d love to hear from you!


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